OK, let me preface this by saying my anxiety is high today because my hormones are a little wacked today which in turn makes me more frustrated. But rant time anyway.
I have two friends in my 8am genetics class. All three of us are retaking it because we needed about two points higher to get the grade we need to have it count towards out degree (need a 70, we all had between a 65 and a 69). One of my friends, let’s call her Sierra. She’s a bio-chem major who has been working her butt off since freshman year. She’s super smart and has a crazy schedule this semester. She and I were texting last night and she was over-tired from studying and tests and was asking for clarification on a couple things. I had to tell her to finish the problem she was on and go to sleep. She did and she ended up missing our 8am this morning, I knew she would, so I had made sure I got extra good notes today for her so that she would have them when we study this weekend.
My second friend, we’ll call her Vivian. We haven’t been friends for quite as long as Sierra and I have, but still, I’ve known her a while. We’re in a couple classes together and hang out pretty regularly. I’ve helped fix her toilet (we completely redid the tank), fixed her drier, changed a weird light on her car, and moved a crap ton of furniture for her (I just have a slightly bigger car and bungee-cords. She texted me at 10:30 last night to say she only got four questions correct on her practice exam for a test she had this afternoon. I asked what happened. Did she not read the questions? Or was it the material? She said both. So ok, let’s give that it was late. The questions can be read better when she’s more awake. I offered to show her how to read the questions and she refused. So then I asked if the problem was that she didn’t understand the material or if she just didn’t know the material. If she didn’t understand the material, I could help there. I passed that class. If she didn’t know the material because she hadn’t put the work in, well, there was nothing I could do to help. Unfortunately, it was the latter. She hadn’t put in the time. She walks in to our 8am this morning and pulls out material for a major project due the following period. She had some of it done, but not all of it. She then tells me that she has the test she started studying for last night and another one for the accompanying lab. She complained about it and then made a comment about how often our professor was looking at the two of us while she was trying to do her report for this other class.
I guess I kind of have to put into perspective the room we were in. It seats around 120 students, maybe 160. There’s like 20 of us. Maybe. And Vivian and I and Sierra usually sit third row, which is pretty much the furthest forward. And I was paying attention because I was taking notes for Sierra.
Vivian’s comments were driving me insane. She brought any extra attention on herself. And when class was over, she just kept complaining about her exams and all of that. I couldn’t deal with what all she was saying.
Then I had one of my good friends from back home text me about how hungry she was and how she woke up too late for breakfast and didn’t want to go to class (she only has class twice a week), etc. That kind of tipped me over the edge.
You know, I don’t care how good of a friend you are to me, if you can’t bother to put any work in to class or try to help yourself at all, I don’t feel bad for you and don’t want to listen to you complain. You aren’t helpless. You made the choice not to study or prepare before now. We’ve all got out struggles. Some of us just bother to put effort in anyway. As my mom says, “Excuses are like butts, everyone has one and they all stink”. And it’s true. And further more, the less you clean up after yourself and your messes, the worse you stink. I just can’t be bothered to care about problems that people have brought on themselves. You didn’t wake up in time to have breakfast? Me neither. I made a peanut butter sandwich and ate it on my way to class. Didn’t have time to study? Yes, you did. You spent all day texting me about the show you were watching instead of studying (for the past few days that’s been happening). Don’t understand material the day of the test? You should have asked for help when it was presented or in any of the previous weeks; asked a teacher, a tutor, me. I don’t feel bad for you because you couldn’t bother to put effort in.
Why am I frustrated with Vivian but not Sierra? Sierra put the effort in. She’s trying. Vivian is just being lazy.
I get so frustrated when you complain about your situation that you put yourself in. You didn’t get up early enough to have a full breakfast? Grab a granola bar, or a sandwich, or any of the above and eat on the go like the rest of us who woke up late. Don’t like that your dishes are all dirty? Get off your butt and wash them. I don’t feel bad that you put yourself in this situation.
We all have our own problems. And some of us are dealing with chronic migraines, debilitating anxiety, and, just to top it all off, a cold, and still pull on our big girl panties and get crap done. It’s not always pretty, but it’s pretty damn necessary. This isn’t high school anymore. You’re juniors in college. Get your crap together. Seriously.